Tag Archives: bts

Reflection on Kindness. A note on BTS-JHope Birthday

Reflection on Kindness. A note on BTS-JHope Birthday

She was arrived at my house when boxes are almost ready to sealed with her father drove a motorcycle around 1 pm. She gave me a box of her secondhand clothes as she eagerly sends me a message earlier to take a part on our event to celebrate BTS-Jhope birthday, 18 February. Nevertheless, I was touched by her father that supported her activities where mostly our fangirling activities are mocked by majority of society. He greeted and smiled to our humble messy garage full of boxes of secondhand cloths and items. Ah I should also mention she is so young, maybe less than 18 years old.

This is our second time of collecting secondhand clothes and items from BTS-AMRY or public in general to be deliver to people in need in Jakarta, and Purwokerto. Last year, we got 3000 secondhand clothes, this year we got more than 6000 clothes and secondhand items like school-bag and shoes in less than one month period.

Among those messages of ARMY on my Instagram and Twitter, they send love and pray that all good things we done will be useful for other and bring happiness to them. May all the good things become our fortune in the next life.

However, our activities are not only bringing good stories and impact. There is story that annoyed me and drive to write this post today to reflect what is kindness means to us.

Our group of ARMY – Bintang Ungu received sack of clothes but they are all garbage! Dirty under-wears, clothes with holes everywhere, one socks instead in pair. There is no way we are going to distribute garbage to the people in need. To me, it is more like an assault to our activities than a supportive donation. We are not the garbage tank, we are not responsible for your fabric waste! Oh how I wish I can send back those garbage to the sender.

It was not the first-time people are ignorance or maybe deliberately send us their waste instead of sharing kindness. Last year, I received broken books, that no longer can be read by others. Worst, some of them are really eaten by bugs.

Something is wrong with the perception of kindness. Kindness is a generous act, empathy toward others, and not expecting rewards. Therefore, if we open the donation for the unfortunate, we are knocking on your kindness heart to act generously. If you have a good empathy, you never ever send the broken items for others, you will share things you love instead. Will you wear other people dirty under-wear?

Kindness has an opposite meaning with Marry Kondo philosophy, to throw out things that no longer bring spark to you. Kindness is about sharing love, share the spark. You give second items because it no longer fits you, your have to give up your things because you don’t have space anymore. You give away things and be happy that others will use them and make them happy as well. But never ever give away your broken item for others to wear.

Kindness is not about making you feel good by what you think of doing good, it is more than that shallow feeling. It is not enough to just give your money to others then ignoring whether your money being use for good or bad thing. Same logic that is not enough to change your plastic straw with bamboo one and keep trashing the world with more other plastic products. Please feel good when you know your kindness act will sustain and bring bigger impact towards others. Be kind as a fellow human being without expecting popularity and price of power, and if there is a fortune in the next life, think of it as a bonus in life.

Today is Jung Hoseok, BTS -Jhope birthday, Hope-Day. He is ARMY’s sunshine and hope, who always brighten the room with his big smile and loud laugh. He is scare mostly with everything but never hide his scare and pretend like a strong one. He got headache with messy room. When it comes to fashion, no other member will be more stylist than he is. He looks fancy and expensive all the time but very humble at the same time. In my imagination life as an ARMY, he is my love-affair beside my love one, Kim Seokjin, or we said my bias wrecker.

Happy Birthday Jwaaeeehoope! Stay shining brightly and happy in many years to come. Love you JHope!


Thank you 2021! It has been an awesome year

Thank you 2021! It has been an awesome year

Day 736 since the pandemic. I am keeping my journal; I am counting my days. Days of struggling to keep my sanity, guarding my mental health, while also enjoying life as much as I can. I live my life fullest because nothing is for granted, my life can be taken anytime, anywhere. When my time arrives, I shall not have regret at all.

2020 is the worst year ever in my life! That pandemic shit got me to my lowest point and so many times I called my beloved dad and my best friend Jon to take me away with them. I was struggling so hard, then I survived thanks with my former boss who helped me with financial issues. Thanks to my partner, though we fought through out the year, we proofed ourselves to stood still no matter what. And thanks to my friends who would not let me down by any chance.

2021 things are getting better. I can walk straight with my head up again. I found my smile and laugh again. Although pandemic worsen on the mid-year, we are among the lucky one to survive. We were struggling to got the vaccine though. We live only 3 hours from Jakarta, but we needed to queue in the crowded lines for six hours to get the vaccines, the ticket to survive. I learned a lot as a common people. Once I gave up my ID as Jakartans, I lost all the privilege as the Jakarta resident.  

Pandemic has taught me a lot about life management. I survived because of my long-term investment of friendships with my besties and network. I learn to save my money, no longer spent it on hedonism lifestyle that I used to had when living in Jakarta and Bali. I really picky on how I spent it. I have a better income this year. I manage to saving and paid my family debt, finally at last.

Life is good this year.

Mentally stable compare to a year before.  I have my happy pills and serotonin booster name Kim Seokjin and BTS. Whenever I am feeling down, I just turn their music on, re-watching their RUN-BTS, and other life show, and following their social media just to boost my mood. I even do painting because of Jin. You know how it feels to fall in love with a person over and over again and it gives you energy to enjoying life and being grateful just for breathing.

Once my mental health is stable and I am happy, my relationship with akang is also stronger and better so does to other member of the family. When I am happy, others will be happy. That’s what it means by love yourself first before you can share love to others.

I haven’t got a chance to apply school for my PhD. I am not making any excuses. I just have not found the right choice of university and moment to proceed the process. The proposal for research is done anyhow, and I know what I want to take. 2022, I should go for it! No more excuses.

If I can survive 2020, I can survive 2022 and hopefully even better than 2021! Thank you 2021, you are awesome.

A Year with You BTS, A Lifetime Changing Experience. Happy Birthday JIN!

A Year with You BTS, A Lifetime Changing Experience. Happy Birthday JIN!

Happy birthday Kim Seokjin! Happy anniversary Nita of becoming BTS ARMY

Today is exactly a year after I officially claimed myself as BTS ARMY. I am about 44 years old in four months, a professional consultant in gender, environmental and media strategy and I received so much questions, if not being called as stereotyping as a fangirl. Are you not old enough to be a hysterical fangirl?

So what if I am being hysterical and consumptive? Do I hurt anyone by doing it? Do I ask your money to buy me a merchandise of BTS? Do I hurt your values by being a fangirl?

I wrote almost ten articles about BTS on this blog and its values with literature basis of analysis. First article is about Being Political with BTS on Jin’s Birthday, received 3447 views since 3 December 2020 and become the most views post I ever had. It does tell me that there are so many people out there want to know more about BTS and why they become the biggest boy band in the world after the Beatles and how they impacted the BTS-ARMY life, just like mine!

Personally, BTS has save my life from mentally ill because of the pandemic. They are here with me through my hard times with their comforting songs. I have friends and supportive families, but as they own life is busy, you can’t burden their life with your story all the time. Therefore, other than my books, my writings, my paintings or drawings, BTS is my comfort zone. There was a time when I got yelled by my mother-in-law so loud that if it was not because the BTS song played in my ear, I might go crazy and dragged me to the lowest point in life. That was my epiphany, a moment that I realize, they just save my life for real.

I decided to go back to school for PhD because of them, because I want to learn how the ARMY communicate with each other through social media to the real-life action and movement. What’s value they believe and share with each other, what’s the demographic in Indonesia, so on and so forth. So many questions that I have in mind that can be explain scientifically about BTS and BTS ARMY and then what the heck are you questioning my fangirling activities?

If today’s post sounds not scientific, it is because today is very personal to me. The day that I decided to became an ARMY, going back to school and be a better person. Within a year I was involve in so many BTS-ARMY projects, two pre-schools, forest planting, art exhibitions. I even started to do painting myself.

Particularly with Kim Seokjin, I saw me in him. You know that your idol is your mirror, yourself in a different kind of person, that’s exactly what I feel with Jin. When his sing “I’m the one that I should love,” that’s why I love him, I love myself. He is so random, warm-hearted, funny, crazy, foodies, free spirited, sometimes loud and sometimes so quiet, sometime out spoken and deep thinker. More or less, that’s me that I believe even the algorithm failed to read me.

We absorb energy and adjust to it. He knows how to make ARMY happy even if he has to embarrass himself with funny things like hair bun during the concert of PTD era. He is the mood, the happy pills for people around him. Being on stage and thousand of eyes can make him happy but at the same time exhausting because he is the energy absorber. He is the glue to different personality and his warm heart makes new people feel welcome and easily making friends with everyone. To those who knew me in person, that’s me. I know my super power of using a sincere smile and laugh to break the ice.

And to my other self, Happy Birthday! Stay happy, stay healthy and stay crazy. We need to keep crazy to survive in this madness of life. You have saved my life, but you need to also save yourself and remember you are loved my thousands of ARMY.

Thank you for having me in this new, full of sincere love of BTS ARMY. Let’s make a brighter, cooler and fun future for our Welcome Generation!

BTS is GOOD for your (print media) business. A piece on V – Kim Taehyung birthday

BTS is GOOD for your (print media) business. A piece on V – Kim Taehyung birthday

I was sitting on my terrace that morning when TIME Magazine arrived. I was in a hurry to unboxing the package that I have been waiting for two weeks and paid like 25K rupiahs more than the usual price. It said due the high demand and they need to printed local.

I was nervous because the cover was not BTS but Kamala Haris and Joe Biden. First I thought they sent me the wrong package, I was nervous. Then on the second page, it said BTS “the Entertainer of the Year” horeee, my heart pumped!  

To be honest, I am totally less interest to read about Kamala Haris and Joe Biden as Person of The Year. I am not going to spent my money on Time just to read them, no matter, how being political I am. Still, I am not interested enough to buy something that is not close related and relevant to me these days. I can read about them online.

But this is BTS! Period.

According to Brandwatch Consumer Research on January 2020, there are 48 million unique authors mentioning BTS online from January 2013 – December 2019. If they are real Army then there are 48 army groups (48 millions soldiers). With 2,199,192,809 mentions or in averages 1,004,197 mention daily!

I am one of them to be certain – oh well, since November 2020.

Anyway, BTS ARMY is a huge market. Just like me, they might not need to read the whole content of the magazine, they just want to collect them for the sake of BTS’s pictures. Time Magazine put BTS on 4 pages (including 1 page with a whole picture), propably only about 3000 words but it sold fast and I was on the second batch of waiting list for the magazine. Imagine how much revenue Time get for one edition with BTS cover and they have been on TIME for like 4 times.

BTS is a  good news for the almost collaps printed media. Put them on cover, boom, the sales rocketed like Burj Kalifa.

I am not making it up.

CNN Business came with the report on 18 December 2020. Variety, WSJ Magazine and Esquire are among those who harvesting revenue from BTS. Variety printed 30% more copies than usual with BTS on the cover. WSJ Magazine came with the statement “[d]ue to overwhelming demand” to reprint its November issue. Esquire typically sells 20,000 copies per issue at domestic retailers and ended up printing an additional 20,000 copies for the US, along with 34,000 copies for South Korea, where they typically sell 100 copies, and another 2,000 copies for Japan.

My friend purchased the Esquire from Amazon and all the way from USA to Indonesia. I did search on e-commerce Tokopedia to look for the price, and all put Pre-Order mode with the full-payment price around hundreds of rupiah and transported from USA or India. Coming soon for January 2021, BTS Army is looking forward for RollingStone and Dicon. For Rolling Stone the Pre-Order has been sold out already on Tokopedia. *clap, clap, clap

It is interesting to see how media has been using BTS for their business because usually is the other way around. Through out BTS history, mainstream media has been ignored them, worst sometimes been direspect them as the “outsider”. BTS does not bigger because of the conventional media, they are bigger because of their great strategy of business of horizontal connectivity with their Army through social media. It is the power of the Army that has push them to the surface of world “domination” (Jin said the world domination was not on their plan, and they just want to be respected). Once they are on the Billboard chart and speech on the UN, mainstream media put attention on them and look for the news worthy of BTS. The media wait for the momentum to publish the news of BTS, and as they predicted, BTS keep making a good momentum with awards, and Billboard Chart. We are all waiting for the Grammy announcement on January 2021 and BTS once again will dominating news.

I am not critizing anything. I am pretty sure a magazine like TIME put BTS article with news-worthy angle so does Esquire that emphasis the story around masculinity value that has been presented by BTS, or Variety with the issue of mental health and WSJ with IPO of Big Hit on October 2020. I just wish the media can dig more than just what already been discuss by others. Go deeper and look for more interesting angles of BTS, because from two months rough research I did, there are so much you can get from BTS and the Army. Put them as the subject with news worthy, help them to spread their value and not just because it is good for your business. Really.

Today is V, the stage name of Kim Taehyung, birthday. Among other members, he is the first visual that everyone can click and remember when they saw BTS for the first time. To me, V is also most interesting figure among them with his visual style. He breaks so many conventional and mainstream rules of what gender looks like. He wears make up, he loves women clothes and accessories. He makes everything looks neutral and everything fit perfectly on him. He has these duality that can be totally different but minggle at the same time. On the stage, I find V with his strong sex appeal but once I watch him on Run BTS or Bon Voyage or any live stream he has, he is just like a baby, a cute normal boy from my neighborhood.

He is impressive in term of art, easy to spot it on his lyrics, music, voice, paintings and his visual arrangement for the group. I am excited to wait for his Mixtape. He has this old soul and his music of classic jazz and soul is so close to mine. He coined Purple Heart or Borahae to express love from BTS to Army and vice versa. Today he will be 25 on Korean age or 24 years and it is going to be a long journey to come for V to reach all of his dream than what he already has.  With his assets, he is going to be bigger then today.

Happy birthday V, borahae. 

Being Political With BTS On Jin’s Birthday

Being Political With BTS On Jin’s Birthday

I decided to write this one in English, the dominant foreign language that I have to mastered if I want to survive in this very competitive era. I learnt English self-taught by listening to New Kids On The Block and later on with Benedict Cumberbatch and all kind of Hollywood movies. I grew up embracing western culture through all kind of entertainment, although now and then, I also enjoy Chinese and Indian movies. I grew up with a strong patriarchy culture through movies and yet community around me. Fortunately, my family is embracing a rare culture where both of my parents are encouraging their daughters to pursue higher education. I was raise to be a rebel, questioning everything, to be able to speak up and being rational.

Being rare type of a woman is not easy when you are living in a strong patriarchy culture community. Just when my nieces born, I know I have a bigger challenge in life to raise them to be a person who is free from toxic masculinity, a gender biased and patriarchy one. We (mom and me, basically) want Zi, Septi and Azki to be able to decide what they want to be or do in this life as a person, not because they are girls. So here comes the story on how BTS comes along with me.

The eldest niece, Zi has been bullied since young age (she is 12 now) because of her tall and bigger body compare to other girls in her school. She is being called the ugly giant. It hurts us as an adult in the family, a lot!. No matter how hard we encourge her to care less about it, she is obviously being hurt. Nevertheless, one day she sent me a video of RM – the leader of BTS speech in UN event and encourge youth to “Love Yourself” and dare to speak up. She changed, she changed a lot. She more confident about her beautiful look and her amazing smart brain. She is RM herself, the nerd one. She starts dancing and make herself a video of singing and dancing a long with BTS song. She is happy.

I recognize BTS since then and being grateful for her. However, not until three weeks ago, I finally able to enjoy BTS songs and get drawn with them since then. I invest time to do research about them and their songs. I want to know more about them, and here are my findings so far.

Breaking language barrier

Not like in my era where my world was dominated by western music and movies, Zi is living where Korean Culture took over. It does not matter that the songs are singing in Korean language, music is crossing that barrier. Like Zi, I can enjoy their music, I sing a long with their song – yes, I try to sing a long in Korean as well, and moves my body following their beat.

BTS has been in Billboard chart many times these days, and got their first grammy nomination this year. They appeared in many western talkshow, concert in English speaking countries in US and Europe. They took over the black and white stage ala the Beatles. Enough for Time Magazine to put them on the cover and said that BTS is the K-Pop Band that conquered the world and as the future leader.

Breaking the toxic masculinity

I am working in around gender mainstreaming issue and I am a feminist. It is so delighful to see BTS breaking all the gender stereotyping where man must follow the mainstream ideal of masculinity. BTS breaks all the rules. They are using make up on stage, following by beautiful dresses in bright colors. They showed empathy, cry on stage is a natural as a human being and not afraid of being soft to each other and they do domestic works. Something that’s rarely being shown in public through media.

Zi following their Vlive, Bon Voyage and everything that related to BTS and she learnt that man and woman is no different in their preference of clothes, work, and visual. People can be whatever they want to be as a person.  

Staying positive

Generation Z is living in the hardest era among all generations. They don’t have a bright future related to environment that being damaged by the older generations, they are living in debt while the opportunities become more limited. They are living in the wire where everything is connected virtually, less time to meet in person and making friends, especially during the pandemic. Youth is being shocked the hardest, yet, BTS has been encourage their fandom to stay positive and keep the positive attitude. Life Goes On as their latest song said.

I have been through most of their lyrics on the net and I am amazed on how deep their thoughts are. They wrote songs to stops being “love slave” aka bucin in Indonesia in Epiphany that said I am the one I should love or enough of “Fake Love”. They talked about the love of art in “Black Swan” that the first death of the artist is when they no longer feel any pulse toward their own art. The whole album “Love Yourself” is encourage youth to be themselves.

They make speech during the exam and graduation moment to remind youth to take a breath and find their own pace because following others can be breathless and trying to please others will make them lost themselves. Not to forget to cherish themselves – all these words are come from my biased Kim Seokjin

As an adult, I am like wow… being smashed many times. I do not mind learn from the youth and I am again being grateful that Zi idolized them.

Being political

By saying “speak yourself” they encourage youth to be a political being. Their fandom BTS Army has been doing lots of things related to political issues, you can do research on what they did during Trump campaign. The Army organized organically toward many social and environmental issues, exactly what we need these days, we need youth to make a movement to build their own better future.  The members have been given an example on doing philanthropy act especially during the pandemic time.  

Being persistence and hard worker

I am being biased toward Kim Seokjin. He is my ultimate biased. I can relate more to him for being funny and dorky outside but the introvert inside. He is trying to make everyone laugh and act as a mood booster. He learns singing, dancing, playing guitar and piano from nothing in the past 7 years while also graduating from college. I told Zi that Jin has shown that talent is nothing compare to hardwork and persistence, that everyone can achieve their dream through hardwork. At the same time, staying humble is a must.

For the past three weeks, my emotion is ups and downs and I know it is natural feeling through this hard times of pandemic. Being alive today is something that I must grateful because tomorrow is clueless. When I am down, I put BTS music and watching Jin’s strange humor and logic help me to survive and laugh out loud.

Since I can not say things personally to BTS members and especially to Jin, let me shout out loud through this blog. Happy birthday Kim Seokjin, may all the good things and peace come to you in these coming years. You deserve all the best things in life. Stay humble, stay funny and genius one. Thank you for saving my life in these hard times, thank you for making me laugh out loud.

Thank you BTS for saving Zi’s, you are all the Anpaman we need these days!