The rebel inside me


I couldn’t recall when I overheard my dad said something to my mom that stuck in my head until now. He said, ‘keep an eye on our eldest daughter, she is different, she is the rebel … she is very wild.’ I remember my mom only laughed at it, maybe because I am pretty much like her while my dad was also one of a kind. He was a Chinese at the squad of the policeman- which was really rare at his time, the shortest one yet the most intelligent one and he changed his Christianity to Moslem, a rebel himself in his family… well you know what they say, an apple won’t fall far from its tree.

I refused to wear a skirt in my first day at elementary school. I want a short pan like other boys. I fought a lot, got punished a lot by school. Neither my mom or dad was really mad at me for being naughty as long that I showed them that I still one of the best in the class. I said no to whatever my dad said or told me, I only hear to what my mom said. As I grew up, my dad was my best counterpart; we debate over everything, from a menu for a day to a television program. He allowed me to speak up whatever that crossed my brain. He trained me to be a rebel with responsibility on what I said and done.

I became a journalist to show him that I can be useful to society without becoming a policewoman as he ever wanted me to be. The universe conspired to train me to live on the edge and natured my rebellious attitude once I stepped in KBR. This is the best political school in my life. As Goenawan Mohammad spoke yesterday (12 April 2016) at the embassy, ‘those whoever had trained by us, we are not actually trained you to be a journalist but to be political (being).’ He precisely right! I became matured with my political point of view, pro-pluralism and proudly to say I am a feminist, that everyone has an equal right.

Today I am on the stage where I don’t need anyone to preach me about morality, I know what I want to do in life, what I need and I believe in the kindness of human being rather than a book dictated by so-called a religious person. My political view is clear, I respect difference political point of view as long as you put it in a logic way. One told me what to do and I will always to do the opposite if my brain and heart can’t accept it. Since I accept and enjoy the rebel inside me, then I suppose I can’t live a calm life, and get bored easily. My life is an adventure and always got stories to tell, and adrenaline to pump and a drama to play.

my family


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